Sunday, November 12, 2006

Global Warming: Keeping the Season Alive, One Chlorofluorocarbon at a Time

The weather is a tempramental little beast, though I am unconvinced this has always been the case. When I was a child, the summers were gloriously hot, the winters were blastedly cold, and spring and fall were always gradually heading towards a respective extreme.

These days, weather and life are much more complex.

I remember driving home for spring break a couple years ago not being able to see the ditches for much of the journey due to the blizzard (and again, Pappy, I'm sorry I took you home in that crap). And I remember dressing my campers with winter wear in August because otherwise they couldn't feel their phlanges. Similarly, the past two years have allowed me to disc golf into November without having to bundle up (this is an oddity in Minnesota). I believe it will come as no surprise to any of you that I have made formal requests to those in charge of such things to keep the cold where it bloody-well belongs. The warmth into the winter I am a bit more hesitant about, but shall suggest, for the sake of congruity, that the weather patterns should stick to the aforementioned cycle.

I have my reasons for supporting the cold for the winter season (and it does not have anything to do with a "white Christmas"). For one, I think its sad that the situation is problem enough that Al "I created the internet" Gore could spot it - honestly, this man should be seen and NOT heard! But more personally, I find the whole thing screws with my Chi. I honestly have at least 5-7 "last rounds" of the season every year and I can't take it! And I have much invested in last rounds. You see, if one is given a blessed day in November, as Wednesday was this last week, one must play. They are (and if I've said it once, I've said it a hundred times) moral imperitives. Not going discing during these times is harder to justify than the Department of Homeland Security.

And so I go on many many last rounds now-a-days. Based solely on playing disc golf, I could count this as one of my virgins in Heaven if I were Muslim, its so good. But there are... complications. I schedule things to begin when discing ends and when it doesn't end til New Years, I must seriously reconsider my scheduling process.

But suffice it to say, now that the official discing season is over (not that we won't go in our coats in two feet of snow), Pap and I have finally started working out. And I'm not going to lie, my silhouette could use it.

"I'm not expecting to grow flowers in the desert,
but I can live and breathe and see the sun in the wintertime"


Song of the Week (a new addition to the column; check it out):

Ron Sexsmith and Chris Martin, "Gold in Them Hills"

1 comment:

URBWes said...

So now this blog is a place to push your political agenda Diggs? I never thought you would stoop so low as to speak poorly about the Department of Homeland Security, or as I like to call it : The HomSecDep. There are many fine men and women hard at work to keep our fears to a minimum. And to bad mouth the Father of the internet? And to use his own creation against him? I hope, for your sake, the Disc Golf season starts again soon or else I fear you may sink to new lows.